Reflective Parenting
Strengthening secure attachment through reflective functioning
Parenting is one of the most meaningful — and emotionally demanding — roles we will ever take on. Many parents find themselves reacting to behaviour in ways that do not reflect the kind of relationship they truly want with their child. Reflective Parenting offers a different path.
Reflective Parenting is a research-based programme developed at the Anna Freud Centre in London, grounded in the work of Peter Fonagy and colleagues in the field of attachment and mentalization. At its core lies the development of reflective functioning — the capacity to understand behaviour in terms of underlying thoughts, feelings, intentions, and emotional states.
When parents strengthen their ability to mentalize, something powerful happens:
behaviour becomes communication rather than conflict.
Research consistently shows that a reflective stance supports:
• Children’s emotional regulation
• Secure attachment
• Greater resilience and social development
• Reduced escalation in parent–child interactions
• A deeper, more trusting bond
Rather than focusing on “fixing” behaviour, Reflective Parenting helps parents understand what their child may be trying to express — and respond in ways that foster safety, connection, and emotional growth.
Our Reflective Parenting Groups
The programme consists of eight weekly sessions of two hours, offered in English in a small and carefully held group setting. This programme is designed for parents of children aged 4 to 12 years — a developmental stage in which emotional regulation, autonomy, and relational patterns are actively forming.
This is a structured psychoeducational programme grounded in attachment theory and mentalization research. It is not psychotherapy, but it is clinically informed and delivered with professional depth and psychological safety.
The group setting is intentional. Within a confidential and thoughtfully facilitated environment, parents are invited to:
• Explore real parenting challenges through a reflective lens
• Strengthen emotional awareness and regulation
• Develop greater tolerance for uncertainty in parenting
• Respond rather than react
The emphasis is on cultivating a secure internal base from which parenting decisions can be made with clarity and steadiness.
Our experienced facilitators create a respectful, confidential and psychologically safe environment where parents can reflect openly, learn from one another, and develop greater confidence in their parenting role.
Parents often report that the programme helps them feel:
• More emotionally regulated
• Less reactive in challenging moments
• More attuned to their child’s internal world
• More secure in their own parenting decisions
The goal is not perfection — it is connection.
Group Availability & Expression of Interest
Groups are formed based on demand and begin once a minimum number of participants is reached.
If you would like to join, click GET STARTED NOW and indicate whether you prefer to attend in:
• The Hague
• Amsterdam
• Online (live sessions)
Reflective Parenting Groups can also be organised for institutions or pre-existing parent groups anywhere in the Netherlands. If this is of interest, please contact us to discuss a tailored proposal.
